RECIPE: POST WORKOUT BLACKBERRY/PB2 PROTEIN SMOOTHIE

if our bodies are mere vessels for our spirit, then how we treat them matters. lately, i have been giving myself daily affirmations and have allowed a gentle opening of space to devote to working out my body, each and every day. it has been so empowering and surreal giving myself strength when i've felt so weak, and working through my negative thinking defaults through pure and salty sweat. each day i leave the gym, i feel a sweet wind move through my lungs and my entire outlook shifts. perhaps that's where all the work really comes from anyway, shifting old habits and replacing them with new ones.

when i get home from the gym, the first thing i love to make are simple smoothies. sometimes i add leafy greens, other times honey, sometimes a handful of almonds or frozen berries or agave. this particular one was made with PB2 which you can find at most local health food stores (i absolutely love it, steve, not so much). if you are in the "not so much" category ~ simply add your own favorite nut butter.

POST WORKOUT BLACKBERRY/PROTEIN SMOOTHIE

ice

rice milk 

half or whole banana

handful of blackberries

greek yogurt (any flavor)

 2 large tablespoons of PB2 peanut butter

1 scoop whey protein

chia seeds (optional)

in a blender, mix together all ingredients until well blended. top with chia seeds and enjoy

1/52

"a portrait of my son, once a week, every week, in 2014."

i couldn't be more in love with the 52 weeks project which simply asks to capture your child exactly as they are. at eight months, augustus is fiercely dreamy and bold and strong and ever curious. if i move into the other room for a slight moment, he is inside a box, turned around or simply on his hands and knees, talking to his friends. wherever this year takes us, i know of one thing: i could watch him grow until i become a mere fossil.

augustus: most days, right after his nap, he buries his body right into my shoulder, consuming my warmth as though he is building a fire with mine. sunday afternoons are no different, except papa sleeps with us. i can't quite explain what it feels like, wait. i don't think i'll ever be able to explain what it feels like to sleep next to them.

that's what lifetimes are for, i imagine.

HERE + THERE

1. fresh trader joe mini roses at my bedside and all over our house

2. after a long saturday nap, playing with his favorite toys ;)

3. my favorite night gown in saturday morning light

4. husband writing scores, just beyond the roses

5. sunday afternoon snuggling

6. mandala~making, far more inexpensive than therapy

7. sweet gift from steve, filled with my favorite tea (genmaicha)

8. our sunday love

the first few days and weeks of any new calendar year always get me incredibly excited thinking about what could happen in the year(s) to come. fresh starts can happen daily, but there's something so beautiful about seeing its freshness in the beginning of january; it's physicality is overwhelming, clear and stands tall like a mighty oak.

to be honest, i am such a victim of fresh starts ~ i've been to the gym more this week than i have in the longest time, i've cooked almost every meal we've eaten, i've been much kinder and a lot of personal goals are manifesting more and more each hour. i am also participating in the 52 week project started by the loveliest which will challenge me to capture my baby boy exactly as he is ~ candidly, without restraint. i have wanted to participate in this series for the longest time, but hadn't a little love to capture.

a little more of what you will see on the blog this year:

here + there: a series of photos from the week that represent a small story of our days. i have a feeling i will love this most, as there is no real order or semblance ~ the photos will be simply enough, all on their own.

sunday soup: for some of our goals this year, my husband and i decided that since sunday is our favorite day of the week (and the day we walk to the farmer's market, stocking up on all the fresh produce for the week), we thought it would be fun (and romantic!) to make soup together with the fresh ingredients we bought that day.

our mornings: simply, what our mornings look like.

lovebody: i am still working through the concept of this one, but what it comes down to is this: finding peace must always start from within.

i can't wait to walk through this year with you all. this time, everything just feels different and possible. everything feels within reach. i haven't always said that, and i might not always say it, but i have a strange feeling that the best is truly yet to come. for us all. xo

TRANSCENDENCE/ A NEW YEAR.

because sometimes life is so fast and so absolute that the only way you can change things is by actually shifting your life utterly and totally to a different hemisphere. you can't partially change. there's no semi-revolution ~ cate blanchett

with love on my heart, i wish you all the happiest new year.

i find myself always having long conversations about time, about where it's going, who owns it, if anyone. why it moves upon us like a slow and steady tidal wave. why, if we don't embrace its unwavering precedence, we lose touch with its delicacy. the truth is, sometimes it's all i think about. 

i think about growing old and what it will feel like to look in the mirror as a woman with decades painted like strokes across my body. i think about what it would feel like to hold a photograph, much like the one above. a photograph of a young girl getting dressed on new years eve to watch her husband play at a big concert. what did that girl know? what did she think she knew? what did she care about? who did she care about? what did she love? who did she love? what broke her heart? what moved her to action? what hurt her? what shaped her? what sounds did she love? what foods did she eat? what were her prayers? what were her anxieties? what was the moment she thought she had it figured out?  

i think about what it will be like to be covered in lines looking back at where i am today, right now, on the brink of a new year as a new mom. whenever i think ahead about where i will be, it helps me to figure out where i am and where i want to be.

i am constantly reminded how quickly time is passing before me as i change my eight-month-old. what fit him two weeks ago seem incredibly snug and the long onesies that used to hang below his tiny feet have grown tight and press hard on his skin. the clothing seems stretched beyond its limit and no matter how much i try to work with it, i cannot force what will not budge. it is a great reminder to me that time will pass anyways, and it is in my best interest to let it be and focus on what i can work with, what i can change. what i can become, really.

i want this year to be transcending.

i want to change, not by little leaps, but by miles. i want to write it down that every day is the best day. i want to work deeply on my marriage. i want to practice my faith, out loud. i want to learn new hobbies, and not give up when i feel like giving up. i want to be less afraid of being in front of the camera. i want to be at peace with exactly where i am. i want to eat most of my food that's given to us from the land. i want to unplug as much as possible. i want to work out the body god has given me, and enjoy the process of becoming stronger. i want to carve out time to myself for yoga and photography. i want more family bike rides and more walks at sunset. i want my motherhood to be real and honest and hopeful. i want to say yes.

and i think most importantly, i want to let go of things that i should have let die a long time ago. i want to be at peace with who i have become and not let what used to keep me up at night plague my days.

cheers to you and yours for a year that won't just be the "best" ~ but a year that will bring you peace and light in spaces that you thought were too dark. run at lightning speed toward whatever is in your heart, because time will pass anyway. it always has, and it always will.

xo